Melissa Sawyer
62 Faith Dr.
Watsonville, CA 95076
December 9, 2012
Steven Sawyer
62 Faith Dr.
Watsonville, CA 95076
Dear Dad,
Looking back to my childhood I can
see just how drastically our family dynamics have changed since my siblings and
I were born. The family I was once used to now seems strange and unrealistic.
When I was born my stay-at-home mother and growing family was solely supported
by you and your income. Over the years, Mom went from housewife to part-time
work and now to a full-time supervisor position. Not only this, but Mom
relishes in both the freedom and responsibilities of work. On the other hand, I
hear constantly of how that last year until retirement could not come soon enough,
and I know how you long to switch to part-time work or even become a
stay-at-home husband. I don’t blame you, Dad, and believe it or not, you’re not
the only one. America has been experiencing a new trend, heightened by the recent
Great Recession, of men losing their jobs and unable to find stable work while
women climb the ladder of success despite the country’s financial situation,
finding themselves on top. For the most part, history has exhibited the theme
of patriarchy all over the world. What if this traditional male dominance is
not what is best for the family unit or society in general? Women are starting
to wear the pants more and more in this society, and I don’t think this is
merely a random phenomenon; women’s dominance in society is necessary – women can
no longer stay in the kitchen if our species is going to thrive on this planet.
Biologically, the idea of a
successful matriarchal society is not a new idea. Consider our closest
relatives genetically: chimpanzees. There are two species of chimpanzees, the
common chimpanzee (Pan troglodytes) and
the bonobo chimpanzee (Pan paniscus). Humans evolved from one species of chimps 4-6
million years ago and the one species split into two roughly one million years
ago. Unfortunately knowledge of the social behaviors of chimps 4-6 million
years ago is not accessible, but there is still a lot to learn from their
modern day counterparts. Both species show a huge maternal influence in
society. In common chimps, although there is an alpha male, he is chosen by the
females in the community. His status in the community is only valuable for
mating purposes and the female chimps are dominant over the rest of the
society, such as the resources. In bonobo chimpanzees, the community is
completely matriarchal – the female chimps have total control over the
community. If the species we once descended from and share about 94% of our DNA
with has found extreme success in a matriarchal based society, why would humans
be any different? How did we become a patriarchal society in the first place?
According to Darwin’s theory of natural selection, if we want to keep evolving
as a species, we must be able to adapt to many types of changes: physical,
geographical, physiological, and especially social. In American society today,
we must adapt to the change in gender dominance once again.
Women seem to be rising to a
place of dominance in American society in several aspects. This is extremely
impressive considering that women received the right to vote in this country a
mere 92 years ago. In American 2 and 4 year universities, women make up 58% of
enrolled students. Not only this, but women tend to drop out less, have a
higher GPA, graduate with honors, and pursue even further education than men. As
explained by the National Census taken in 2010, “Among the population 25 to 29,
36 percent of women had a bachelor's degree or more, compared with 28 percent
of men.” It seems that the younger the generation, the further the gap widens between
males and females concerning college degrees. Statistics also show that today
women make up 46% of the labor force in America whereas in 1900, fewer than 20%
of women worked outside of the home. According to a New York Times article
written by Hanna Rosin, “Of the 15 categories projected to grow the fastest by
2016 — among them sales, teaching, accounting, custodial services and customer
service — 12 are dominated by women.” She goes on to explain that even though
these may not be the most desirable or well-paid positions, they are the most
stable and consistent fields of work today. Very physical trade type work, like
construction, is out and more maternal based fields, like teaching and nursing,
are in. It is also true that women only make 77.5 cents to every dollar a man
makes, but this gap has been reduced substantially and only continues to
shrink. An article by CBS News explains that “the number of stay-at-home dads
who are the primary caregivers for their children reached nearly 2 million last
year, or one in 15 fathers.” This has never been seen before in America and it
is becoming more and more common as time goes on.
On the other hand, this scenario
is not experienced worldwide. As Salam explains “while North American and
Western European men broadly – if not always happily – adapt to the new
egalitarian order, their counterparts in the emerging giants of East and South
Asia, not to mention Russia, all places where women often still face brutal
domestic oppression, may be headed for even more exaggerated gender inequality”
(634). Salam explains that although Western developed nations tend to have a
more open mind towards drastic social changes in gender roles, this is not true
for the entire world. Countries like China and those of the Middle East are
still very much male-dominated and a gender role switch will not occur easily,
or possibly not even at all. In Chinese society, the economy is thriving and
male-dominated fields are still growing. This country can support the patriarchal
society they have been accustomed to since the start of their nation.
Considering population, United Nations statistics show that in China there are
93 women to 100 men. Even more surprisingly, in Qatar there are only 32 women
per 100 men and in Bahrain there are a mere 60 women per 100 men, both countries
in the Middle East. On the other hand, both the United States and the United
Kingdom have 103 women per 100 men in their national population. This trend is
also seen in the percent of educated men and women in Western nations versus
those in the more male dominated societies. In many of these strict patriarchal
countries, removing men from society seems very unrealistic.
Change is occurring regarding
gender roles in the United States whether Americans like it or not. Change is
hard, scary, and frustrating, but it is also necessary for the evolution of our
species. Men can fight the change all they want, but it is looking more and
more like women are winning this battle. The other option is to adapt. Men
would benefit greatly by pushing aside past male gender roles and male
expectations in other areas of the world and consider what is going on in the
world around them. Obviously, this is not even always necessarily true for all
American men. There are many fields of work that men are generally more suited for.
A great example of this is math and science. Data explains that male high
school students on average score higher on the math portion of the SAT test.
These fields also still have a fairly large gap between men and women employed in
the field. Not to say that women cannot find employment in these fields, but
tendency shows that men thrive more in these areas. Men will never become
completely obsolete in the workforce, but men need to consider how the gender
dominance switch will affect them and their families personally. An open mind
is key for adaptation. The longer men fight society, the more dissatisfied they
will become with both themselves and the world around them resulting in
depression, substance abuse, violence, and so much more. To counter this, the
sooner they adapt, the sooner they’ll be able to find their new place in
society.
Dad, this step you are taking to
adapt is extremely helpful for not only you and our family but also for society
as a whole. It is in our genes to be a matriarchal society. This may be
completely against what your father and grandfather would encourage or what
other parts of the world are doing, but it is what is best for you. Not only is
this the best choice for you, but American and Western European men seem to be
following this same pattern overall. Acceptance and adaptation will allow our
species to continue and evolve rather than destroy itself. You’re making
history!
Yours always,
Melissa